Fresh Meat…
Candy Craving… Suckers 
The play party was last night. It was a very small gathering… 15-20 people. I felt very shy at first, I didnt know many of these people. A few people have commented at munches, dungeon, etc that I’ve been “off” in my mood. In truth, I’m not feeling off. I actually feel very serene with my life. I think the biggest difference is I just dont fell like talking much. I’m dont have that very “bubbly” additive to my personality. I’m in a very voyeuristic mood, just watching those around me. The same was said last night at the party. I was glad my GF came but, she and i seem to be “off” at the moment. I guess its because we are at such different places in our lives. I talked with Sir last night about the situation. I see how people are reacting to meeting her and their physical reactions. She is pretty, and shes recently lost a ton of weight (due to surgery). I definitely think shes more confident with her body now! Its interesting how people react to “Fresh Meat”. LOL. It is quite literally what she is. Everyone had an eye on her. It didnt hurt that her husband wasnt there, so she was a bit of the odd man out as well. Of course we snuggled with her and such so she wasnt lonely. But she had MANY Offers to play last night which was very interesting. I remember when I was “fresh meat”… it was like watching my experience happen all over again. I just hope she doesnt make the same mistakes i did. I ADORED the attention…lets be honest, who doesnt? At the time I was MUCH younger…and very very new. I had no idea what to expect or feel or even how to act. Most anyone will tell you now that I definitely had a hard case of sub-frenzy. Anyway, I just hope she makes wise choices.
I wasnt in a playful mood unfortunately. I was feeling rather horny though . As I watched and listened, I got hornier. I think we were the only people who didnt play in some way or fashion. Sir is NOT a public player by any means but, he’ll often let me play if I want. I did get asked if I wanted to play by the host but, it got forgotten after He took a break and we began to watch a very intense spanking. I swear that girls butt was BLACK. Her Dom broke 2 toys over her butt. That was very intense to me in sound but i know it often sounds worse than it feels. I definitely cringed a couple times and I also realized that I would have to be bound for a spanking of that intensity. I dont know if i could even maintain mental bondage, i like to pull and struggle too much.
The birthday girl was a human platter for her brownie cake. We lathered her up with cream cheese icing and took the brownies and laid them out all over her breasts and stomach and a bit farther down 
. Of course we had to spell out happy birthday with the sugar lettering as well! The host had a wonderful time playing with her too while we decorated. She was so ticklish and just would not stay still!! So he’d give her legs a good smack every time she moved LOL. Lastly, we couldnt forget the candles! So a little wax play was thrown in with some candles being set in the icing as well. Have you ever tried to blow out your birthday candles when they’re on your stomach and you’re laying down? That was sooooo funny!! We called mercy after they started melting the icing and all the brownies were falling off. Then we had a WONDERFUL time licking the brownies off her..hehe! Oh and her spanking later was done in DOG years! That was great!
All in all it was a fantastic time. I wish I had felt a bit more bubbly. I was rather shy and quiet for much of the evening. I just didnt feel like I had much to say honestly. There were plenty of conversations, I just didnt feel like I had anything to contribute. I definitely loved being able to watch everyone. I just hope that the hosts werent upset or disappointed that we didnt play. I guess we’ll see if it gets mentioned later or if they have another party. Sometimes you’re just not in the right frame of mind. I do that Sir will be in the mood to have a light scene later today. I would love a spanking . I also think that for once I have no interest in playing with anyone but Sir. I dont really even want to be touched by anyone but him right now… even the people i normally snuggle up with! Maybe its just hormones, its certainly not in my norm thats for sure.
Slower week is approaching so that will give me time to blog about some things that have been on my mind. I’m only working two days this week. I’ve got some chores I want to get done and I’m going to enjoy spending the day with my mom this week. Life is getting a nice rhythm to it. I feel blessed. I’m getting healthier as well. I’ve definitely lost a size, and this week I’m tackling the biggest issues…my diet. Usually exercise is my biggest issue but this time exercise as come easy for me. I think because I’ve been able to relate to it as socializing with my gf or my mom. I’m having a harder time dropping the soda’s, the candy, and the carbs. I’m never going to totally drop my sweets because i always need a bite of something sweet…but, cutting back is good. The biggest area is soda and starchy foods for me. I’m excited that people are starting to be able to notice the weight loss. Sir has noticed, the party hosts noticed, and my mom noticed!! Encouragement really keeps me going!
